Abuse
by lizzy74656
Summary: Someone is hurting and doesn't really know why. Finds some answers with an old acquaintance.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimers: I don't own the STVoy: mores the pity I just play with them now and then. Other characters mine and a friends.**

**Abuse!**

Chakotay felt trapped and wasn't quite sure where to turn, as he paced around the luxury apartment that was really his cage.

'Why had he come here?' he asked himself silently; 'How had it come to this?' was the thought that rang around inside his head. 'Who should he ask, who will listen?' his dark eyes sad, lonely and fearful.

"How had she come to have this hold on him?" he asked of the silent empty room. His pacing had brought him to stand in front of the com-unit. 'Could he risk it?' Quietly he sat down and dialled a number and anxiously waited for the connection to open, whilst keeping a fearful ear out for the owner of the apartment to return. Soon a woman's face looked out at him, her smile faded at his anxious expression.

"I'll get to you as soon as I can, Chakotay," she told him and closed the link. He turned off the unit and returned to the kitchen area and started on the meal that had been requested, but he was nervous, so much so that he couldn't stop shaking. In his mind he couldn't stem the memories of the last few months since he'd come to this place. Memories that were too painful to fully recall, he was still limping from the last showing. One he hoped not to have repeated. 'WHY?' it was the one question that he couldn't answer because the cause wouldn't say. As he prepared the vegetables in the windowless kitchen he recalled that she would only use words that caused him pain, emotional pain, telling him that no one would help him or listen to him or say a word against **her**; they wouldn't dare – if they knew what was good for them – she'd cruelly sneered at him. He'd only asked why they couldn't go out for a meal and why he had to stay in the apartment, hidden from view. Anyone would have thought he'd asked to go to Ocampa and back, with the way she'd reacted. His body shivered at the memory.

Chakotay couldn't remember the last time he'd spoken with any of his friends from Voyager, since they'd arrived back on Earth. It felt like she was punishing him for some wrong; but what? That was what he didn't understand. He carefully put the few knives he had away in their draw and re-locked it, once he'd finished using them, with the woman's current mood and attitude towards him, he didn't trust her with any sharp objects. Having put the vegetables on to cook he set about laying up the table for two, not that he ate at this table, she just liked to see it set that way. Looking at the time piece on the main apartment wall he felt his anxiety hitch up a notch and he tried to stem the visible shaking of his body. Hearing the lock on the apartment door click open he tried to quash his panic and smiled pleasantly at the uniformed female figure.

* * *

What happened next was a blessed blank hole in his memory and in some ways he would be ever grateful for that; the next thing he clearly recalled was a woman's quiet anxious voice calling him by name, and that he was lying curled up on the kitchen floor, with his latest journal clutched tightly to his chest, his body numb, although it hurt to move, even to breath deeply. The Doctor was also there running a medical tricorder over him.

"We need to get him to a hospital," he said, his voice tinged with controlled anger.

"That will be the first place she'll look. No you'll have to patch him up as best you can and then he's leaving," the woman said decisively; this was the same woman he'd called on the com-unit. He couldn't or wouldn't call her by her name even mentally because of the pain it caused him, shuddering at the memory.

"It's alright, Chakotay," she soothed him. "I've brought some clothes for you. When the Doctor has finished patching you up, I suggest you take a quick shower and get dressed," she advised quietly. He nodded to her and allowed the male medic to use the dermal regenerator on the worse of his cuts and bruises. He limped carefully to the bathroom and took the only type of shower the computer would allow him – a sonic shower. The clothes that had been laid out for him were of an older period than the current fashion, but he wasn't complaining; it felt good to have cloth next to his skin again. He looked at his reflection in the bedroom mirror; he was shocked at the paleness of his skin and the bruising around his left eye. 'She always went for that side,' he thought, fingering the blue/black lines amidst the colourful bruises.

"Ready?" asked a quiet voice. He nodded silently; he was too emotionally choked to speak, reaching for his journals. She held out his boots and he put them on, they chafed the soft skin as he'd not worn them for quite awhile now. The woman put a heavy trench coat round his shoulders, which reached down to his ankles and then put a brimmed hat over the left side of his head, covering the tattoo. She picked up a handled canvas bag, took his hand and gently lead him out of the apartment and on out of the building, passing the security desk without a murmur from the man on duty.

She took him to the nearest transporter and had them transported to the main spaceport. Once there she gave him the canvas bag into which she'd put his journals, having gently taken them from his tight fist. She gave him a sad wistful look.

"I shall go back home from here," she sighed taking his face in both her hands. "Go wherever you wish, just contact me when you're safe. I don't want to know the where though," she cautioned him. "Now go, Chakotay and please don't worry," she said and then disappeared into the crowds, leaving him feeling even more alone than he'd been in the apartment.

He stood near a booking terminal so he called up the list of destinations and scrolled down it until he reached 'Trill'. Something about the name appealed to him, so he called up information about the next available scheduled flight out to the planet's main city – Mak'ala.

#Next scheduled flight to Trillus Prime is due to be called for boarding in two minutes time.# the PA system verbally informed him, thus he booked a one-way ticket and paid for it from his credit account; punching in the numbers rather than using the thumb print panel.

#Thank you for your custom# the PA system said and printed out his ticket which also told him the shuttle gate he was to make for.

* * *

Chakotay settled himself into a quiet corner aboard the civilian transport vessel that would take him to Trillus Prime. He felt tired physically and emotionally, gazing out of the vessels large view ports at the blackness of space and the blueness of Earth. Tears stung at the back of his eyes and choked his throat, yet he knew he wouldn't cry just yet, he was too emotionally wrung out and yet coiled tight like a spring.

"Hello!" said a small voice; startling him. The voice belonged to a young girl child of about six or seven years of age, with light hazel eyes and mousey brown shoulder length hair. Her pretty face gazed up at him innocently. She reminded him of Naomi Wildman with that wide eyed expression, causing him to smile. The child grinned in response.

"I knew you could," she announced decisively, sitting down next to him.

"Do what?" he asked, his voice more of a whispered croak than his usual soft timber.

"Smile," she said knowledgably. This had his dimples showing for the first time in a long while.

"Tilly. I've told you before not to talk to strangers," a harassed female voice said, coming over to the pair.

"He's no stranger," Tilly replied to the woman, who was so very obviously the girl's mother, for they could have been twins.

"Why is that?" he asked amused, having got his voice under control.

"You smiled," she said importantly. "Strangers don't smile." Chakotay grinned at her reasoning, yet her mother looked non-pulsed by this.

"You are one very forward young lady, Tilly." The girl sat up straighter beside him, her mother shook her head, wondering what to do with this little lady. "You are welcome," the man said indicating the seat beside him. He removed his bag off the seat and put it down between his feet and added the hat there too.

"Oh, pretty," said Tilly on seeing the lines on his forehead.

"Thank you. I'm Tamasin and you've already met Tilly," the woman smiled, holding out her hand to him.

"Chakotay," he said, taking her slim hand into his own.

"We're going to join my Daddy," Tilly announced. Her mother tried to look anywhere but at this handsome male with the dimpled smile. Chakotay squeezed the woman Tamasin's hand gently understanding something of her dilemma about her young daughter.

"What did your mother say about strangers?" he asked teasingly.

"But you're not a stranger. You are Cha-k-oo-tay?" He laughed. Tilly looked affronted.

"Tilly you are a wonderful little girl," he smiled, his dark eyes shining with merriment. "I'll tell you what, why don't you call me 'Tay', it'll be easier for you to manage and as it was my childhood name; that means we can be children together. What do you say?" Tilly at first looked at him surprised, but as she thought about it, her expressive little face relaxed, then she giggled.

"You BIG child!" she said seriously.

"Hmm! True but space is an even BIG-GER place," his hands making a big globe shape.

"We could get lost if there wasn't someone to look out for us," her mother added, getting into the spirit of the conversation. She liked this big quiet man and knew that he would look after her and Tilly for the duration of their journey. When her husband had suggested that his wife and daughter make the journey on public transportation, rather than waiting for his ship to return to Space dock one; she was not happy, but now with 'Tay' she felt comfortable.

* * *

The three 'Tees' – Tilly, Tamasin and Tay – passed away the time on their long journey happily swapping stories and games, although Chakotay 'Tay' didn't reveal much about where he was heading or why he was on this journey, it didn't seem to matter. Mother and daughter were to disembark at an orbital station at the borders of Trill space.

By the time they reached that station, Tilly was curled up asleep on 'Tay's' lap. He gently woke her whilst her mother – Tamasin saw to it that their luggage was ready to disembark with them.

"Hey, sleepy-head, time to go," he teased quietly. The little girl stirred, but seemed reluctant to leave his warmth. He again gently shook her, so that she opened an eye and looked at him. His face relaxed into a warm smile and she returned it, before stretching and yawning.

"You be a good girl 'Lady Tilly'," he said, easing her off his lap to stand on the floor.

"I will, 'Uncle Tay'," she gave him an odd look. "Maybe strangers do smile, but not all smile so genuinely as you," she said. The profoundness of her statement left Chakotay reeling somewhat. Her mother returned at that moment saving him from having to say anything; Tamasin thanked him for his kindness, support and company, holding out her hand. Chakotay took it intending to just shake it in the usual manner, but he brought it to his lips and kissed it.

"Your husband is a lucky man; have a safe journey." Tamasin found herself blushing; she excused herself by taking Tilly's hand and then they left. Chakotay was sorry to see them go, but it was for the best, recalling what one of the crew had said to him earlier on the journey.

"Captain's glad you've been looking after the lady and her little one. He was not happy to see that the pair were unaccompanied; as this trip is mainly male worker types and rather rough to boot."

"I'm pleased to be of service," he'd responded politely and had returned to the pair. He had noticed the rough males, but they'd stayed well away from them and as they had disembarked first at the mining station, the three more or less had the ship to themselves. At the border station the ship picked up additional passengers for the trip into the Trill system; thus the ship filled with mainly Trills some in Starfleet uniform. So he put his hat back on his head to hide the tattoo, that little Tilly had found so fascinating. He tried to sleep but his fatigue wouldn't let him, thus he comforted himself with his memories of the stories he'd told to Tilly about Voyager's adventures in the Delta Quadrant, making out as if they'd happened to someone else. If Tamasin knew the truth, she never said.

* * *

When the transport touched down on Trillus Prime it was late afternoon local time, yet because of the heavy rains and the dark clouds it looked a lot later. One of his fellow passengers had groaned when they realised they'd hit the start of the Deka-mons; when it rained for ten days straight – if they were lucky. Chakotay though didn't mind, he welcomed the cold watery down pour at first, allowing it run down his face cleansing him. Later a cold wind blew round the buildings in the main city as the night drew in, chilling anybody who was out and about the city streets. By now Chakotay had no idea where he was or where he was trying to get to, as he looked round him in the rain filled deserted streets. Seeing an open coffee shop, he headed towards it hoping that they could help him find lodging. He slipped on the wet sidewalk, jarring his foot and leg in the process.

The pain in his hips – which had been a dull nagging ache – flared angrily through that region of his torso. He stopped gasping at the sudden pain, almost bending over double.

"Hey; you alright?" called a male voice from outside the now darken coffee house. The male came over and helped him to stay upright.

"Alyxx, I'm looking for Alyxx," he panted round his pain. "You know her?"

"I think so. Here give me your arm," taking Chakotay's right arm and placing it over his shoulders and aided their course down the street. "I believe she's residing hereabouts," the male muttered, taking most of Chakotay's weight as he limped beside him. They soon discovered the apartment building where the woman lived on the ground floor, thus her front entryway was facing the street, rather than having to enter the main building.

"You manage?" his rescuer asked, propping him up in the doorway. "I need to get on my way home." Chakotay nodded and the man left; so when the door opened only a now very wet human male stood outside.

"CHAKOTAY!" she said, surprised to see him. "Come on in," she encouraged, taking his bag, whilst he grabbed the door frame and hauled himself inside. "Let's get you out of all this wet gear," she continued to talk, her soft voice a gentle soothing balm to his ears, as she helped him out of the heavy trench coat, which was now even heavier with its soaking from the rain. "You would have to choose the start of Deka-mons for a visit," she teased him, urging him to take a warm shower. "I've set the program for 15 minutes, that should be long enough to help warm you up," pointing out the door that led to the bathroom. "Just leave your wet clothes on the floor, I'll sort them out later," she said disappearing up the main hallway to the living room. She called to someone named Suaig to heat up something. He lost the words and sight of her; carefully he entered the bathroom, stripped and walked into the shower, which quickly dowsed him with warm water bring warmth and life back to his numb limbs.

Even when the water stopped he just stood there, the long held back tears pricking the back of his tired eyes. Her soft voice called him by name gently, if she'd seen his bruises, she said nothing, but wrapped a large warm soft towel around his torso and rubbed him dry. He pulled in a sharp breath when she reached his hips. For a moment she stopped, her voice still reassuring she explained what she was about to do.

"Hold onto the shower frame, Chakotay. I'm going to feel your pelvis bone," she told him placing her palms on the top of his rear cheeks. "Easy my friend," she soothed, gently pushing her hands up and round to the front of his hips. "It's alright," halting her movements when he gasped. She waited until he was ready and his breathing sounded less pain filled.

"Please," he whimpered, the tears spilling down his face. She called Suaig again, having moved her hands to his waist.

"Alyxx?" a deep voice hissed.

"We need to get him to the hospital, now," her voice decisive.

"NO!" he pleaded, his body trembling.

"Chakotay you have a possible fractured pelvis and it needs to be seen to now. We're not on Earth," she added the last statement gently, moving round him, so he could see her face. "No one here will hurt you," her smile brightens her Trill shaped face. "Now are you going to be a big boy, for me?" she teased softly. A smile tugged at his mouth and he nodded his head.

"I have called the hospital. They are waiting for us," said the deep voice hissing on his es's. Alyxx wrapped a drier towel around him and told him to let Suaig carry him, whilst she got a coat for the pair of them. A large scaly hand gently supported him and aided Alyxx in putting the weather proof coat over the towel on Chakotay. With ease the tall Gorn – the male Suaig – lifted the human male into his arms and they left the apartment.

* * *

The grey fog that had clouded his mind lifted allowing him to take stock of where he was. The room was semi-dark and the bed beneath him was soft and comfortable. Barely audible clicks and beeps played across his ears, the wires and tubes that had been in his dreams were no longer in evident. The door quietly opened and a Trill female in casual clothing entered, so he knew she was not one of the nursing staff that had also been apart of his dreams.

"How are you feeling?" she quietly asked, taking his right hand into hers, sitting down on the chair at his bedside. He sighed and closed his eyes and realised there was a bandage across his left one, which panicked him.

"It's alright, Chakotay. The bandage is to aid the healing process," she assured him, her smile in her tone of voice. He smiled at her and was about to ask a question, when the tall green Gorn entered.

"And how's my favourite patient, this bright sunny morning?" the male asked happily, still hissing on the es's. Alyxx laughed softly at his startled expression.

"That's right, my friend you have slept right through the Deka-mons," she laughingly informed him.

"Beastly stuff rain," hissed Suaig, checking the monitors.

"Ten days? I've been asleep ten days!" not quite believing it.

"Actually, you've been asleep for almost twelve," she informed him, giving his hand a soft reassuring squeeze.

"Sleep good for my patient," hissed the Gorn.

"Suaig Hoon is an exile from Gornia and a practising Doctor here at our main hospital."

"Oh," sounding a little uncertain.

"We'll have you back on your feet in no time," Suaig said cheerily.

"With you treating the patience's, it's wonder they don't run a mile." Alyxx laughed both at his abrasive tone and the Gorn's obvious offence; as the colour of his multi-facet eyes changed from the calm blues and greens to an angry pinkish hue.

"I have you know...."

"Suaig. And **you** Mister should know better," she admonished them. Both looked suitably chastened so she let it go. "If you behave yourself I'm sure the good Doctor might let you out for a weekend visit," she said, smiling encouragingly.

"Well I think I could manage that, if only to get away from him."

"I'll doubt you'll do that, young man," Hoon hissed. "Alyxx Darkka only has room space in **my** apartment," the big Gorn said. The PA system announced that Dr. Hoon was required to report to reception, so he left.

"Sorry, Chakotay. I should have warned you about that; I'm not on Trillus Prime often enough to warrant the expense of keeping an apartment. And before you ask, my father remarried."

"Oh and Darkka?"

"Darkka is my symbiont. We were joined in 2362; you were the Conn officer aboard the USS Gettysburg that transported me here at that time," she softly informed him.

"I'd forgotten that," he said feeling long forgotten tears threatening. He wanted to speak about something to her, yet she put a gentle finger against his lips; with that quiet gesture she told him to wait until he was ready.

"Find yourself, my friend and then we can deal with everything else," her quiet words and soft understanding expression had his tears spilling down his cheeks in an endless flow. Alyxx sat on the bed and held him against her as he cried out his pain and fear; she gently rubbed her hands across his back in a comforting manner whilst his tears soaked her shoulder.

* * *

Exhausted by his emotional outpouring, he'd been settled down in the bed to sleep; but the memories came flooding back to haunt him disturbing the sleep he so badly needed. His screams did not wake him, but they did alert the hospital staff to his plight. Dr. Hoon was recalled from home as the male thrashed about in the grip of his nightmares. With a gentle tenderness that surprised Chakotay the big Gorn eased him out of the bad dreams and held him as again he cried. He'd made the bed wet so they set up a catheter, once they'd got him and the bed changed. It was not a pleasant feeling having the catheter there, but he knew it was for his convenience.

"What is wrong with me?" he asked shakily.

"Chakotay now not time for you to know. It time for you to sleep," the Gorn hissed gently. Reading the stubborn look on the man's face, he added quietly; "When time right you will be told."

Chakotay knew from the Gorn's tone and the colour of his eyes he was speaking the truth and with that statement of fact he had to be content; thus he snuggled down into the warm dry bed clothes to try to get some sleep.

He was aware that he would not be alone in the room, as a medic sat near the door so as to be on hand if he needed medical attention. Chakotay had a feeling this was going to be a long night, drifting back into natural sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**See Chapter one for Disclaimers:**

**Chapter 2**

Chakotay didn't remember much about the next few days and nights, except that they'd been full of broken sleep and strange half images, tears and gentle comfort, full catheter's and warm broth, filling his stomach. When awake they also took him to the therapy pool, to exercise his wasted leg muscles. Only his right arm worked properly as the left shoulder blade had been broken, his arm pulled or twisted from its socket and then pushed back into the broken bone, so that the bone overlapped, not allowing it to heal itself. There was also the possibility that something else might be responsible for the lack of healing in his bone structure. What that might be the Trill medic's had yet to discover; for they were not use to dealing with Humans and their medical problems.

Dr. Hoon wanted to wait until the surrounding muscle tissue had lost some of it's rawness before attempting to reset the damaged shoulder. So Chakotay did his best to exercise it as far as the broken bone would allow him, which meant that it couldn't be stretched upwards over his head or anywhere above shoulder height. He could just about pull his left ear sometimes, making Alyxx smile as she knew it was an unconscious habit he had when perplexed or off balance emotionally.

* * *

One morning he was wheeled into the scanner room after his session in the therapy pool. The medic's laid him out on the scanner bed, with his right arm over his head, but the left folded at the elbow at his side, thus his hand resting beside his shoulder on the bed. Hoon stood near him and explained what was to happen.

"The scanner will work around you 360 degrees and give us a three-d picture of your skeletal structure first and then your muscle tissue and finally your upper dermal layers. Just breath easy and everything will be fine. I know many find this machine a bit intimidating and threatening. Might be best if you close your eyes," he added quietly. Chakotay smiled realising the big Gorn was teasing him, but he did close his eyes, for the large machine that would tunnel over and around his torso was a bit daunting. The soft whirl of the scanner caused his heartbeat to increase, yet the gentle toned voice of the senior Trill medical technician telling him to relax and to breath easy as well as to keep still, reassured him. Although the voice had come over a PA system it had sounded natural as though he was standing in the room with Chakotay, which helped him to relax.

"All done," hissed Hoon to the slightly drowsy human male, a little while later.

"Oh? I was just getting comfortable," he said, allowing the medics to assist him in getting off the bed and back into the wheelchair.

"I think you did fall asleep for a while at one point," noted the Trill medical technician, who'd spoken to him earlier in the scanning process. "The results Dr. Hoon; it includes the test results taken from his blood and urine samples," giving the Gorn a data chip. The male Trill with the standard brown spots, smiled at Chakotay with an expression the human male didn't quite understand.

"Thank you, Armel," the Gorn acknowledged and pocketed the chip. "Time for you to have a short home visit," he said, his facet eyes a pale blue and white.

Chakotay was getting used to the colour changes and could most times interpret the mood that the male Gorn was in, but today this was a colour combination he'd not come across before, so wasn't sure as to whether Suaig was unhappy about this visit or something else. He hoped it was the latter as he enjoyed the big green lizard's company, even if he did scold him, but it was usually over something medical rather than personal.

* * *

At the apartment a strong pleasing aroma wafted out to meet them as they crossed over the main threshold.

"Hmm! something smells really good," he said breathing in deeply the delicious aroma. "I hope it tastes as good as it smells," he teased the Trill female, who greeted them. The look she threw in his direction told him in no uncertain terms how she felt about his attitude, just in case he didn't understand or get the message, she voiced it also.

"Carry on like that, **Mister** and I'll send you to bed without any supper," Alyxx admonished and then totally ruined the threat by grinning at him. "Good to see you in such high spirits," bending down to kiss his cheek. "Suaig, you're very quiet, everything alright?" she asked concerned.

"Need to check over Chakotay scanner and chemical test results. I have something to eat later," and with that he disappeared into his study.

"I don't know, Alyxx," he said, before she could ask the obvious question. "I wasn't told," he admitted, his expression sad.

"Nothing we can do about it," she said, shrugging. "Want to eat?" she asked brightly. "Silly question," she noted at the grin he gave her; thus she wheeled him into the dinning area and they ate the stew she'd made of Trill wild fungi with herb dumplings and baby carrots in rich thick gravy.

"Hmm that was really delicious," his tone of voice conveying his appreciation for the meal.

"Considering that you had **two** helpings, says a lot," she said smiling at him. "Tea?"

"Please. Alyxx did you set up that connection...?"

"Yes, Chakotay I have," she answered carefully from the kitchen area in the open plan dinning area. "I suggest you give it a try tomorrow morning."

"Thanks," he responded, taking the mug of hot tea she handed him, but they both knew it was it was in answer to what he'd asked about also. Quietly they drank their tea together, watching the changing western sky outside.

* * *

"Staring at the screen won't change the nature of what you're about to do," Alyxx's voice admonished gently, from one side of him. Around and behind him was a blank canvas screen, so that when the visual connection was made via the com-link, nothing in the background would give away his location to the receiver. "Are you sure you want to do this?" she asked him softly.

"I did promise her," he said, gulping down his panic and unease.

"I'll leave you to it," she said and left. Chakotay breathed deeply and tapped out the destination and name of the person he wanted to contact. As he waited for the connection, he recalled what Alyxx Darkka had told him about this com-link set-up.

"It is routed through the main civilian network so will go through more than one call exchange and the person the other end, must identify themselves to the last exchange operator, before the connection is fully opened. So you will only see the person you are expecting to see and no one else from the same household. It will also prove difficult to trace the source, unlike through Starfleet channels."

Chakotay hoped it would be enough, as he waited for the connection to open, feeling his nervousness growing. Then the screen flashed up 'Com-link established with Gretchen Janeway, Indiana, Earth.' over the Trill symbol and then the screen cleared to reveal the woman's face.

"Hello," he said shyly. Her smile lit up her face which relaxed him.

"Just one moment," she said and got up. He widened the angle and saw her close the door of the small study area and then sits down again in front of the screen. "You are looking well. How are things with you?"

"I am safe and being well cared for," he responded still feeling nervous.

"I'm pleased for you." She could see he was rather unsettled at calling her.

"I would like to contact Tom and B'Elanna, but I'm not sure how they will respond and....."

"I think you know how B'Elanna will respond don't you?" At his nod, she added, "You're not ready for that sort of onslaught, are you?" He grinned ruefully and shook his head this time. "I understand. I'll see how the lie of the land goes?" she said teasingly.

"Thank you. You'll find a data file attached, for download. Please give it to the Doctor....." he stopped his eyes wide and fearful at the sound of the voice he heard.

"Call me again in two days. Gretchen out," she said and cut the connection.

For a moment Chakotay just sat there trembling staring at the blank screen. It was the terminating of the link by his friend Alyxx that brought him back to himself.

"How did it go?" a deep male voice asked, having removed the screens.

"Well," he whispered his voice still in shock. "It went well," Chakotay said, getting his voice and nerves under control. "I'll give her another call in a couple of days," wheeling his chair away from the com-unit to the area's main lounge windows.

"Me think you need two days, just to get courage again," Suaig hissed good naturedly. Chakotay felt himself grin at that observation, looking at the big Gorn.

"I sent the medical file, for the Doctor," he added seriously.

"Good," was the single worded response from Dr. Hoon. Alyxx said nothing, but she watched his body language for the rest of that day, for she could see something had upset him and he wasn't really looking forward to contacting the female Gretchen Janeway again.

* * *

Later whilst Suaig Hoon was at the hospital – as he was on emergency call out, Alyxx softly spoke to him, about things pertaining to how she'd met him in their shared past.

"I'll never forget that moment when you caught me at the computer terminal in the history archives. You gave me quite a scare," she said. "I thought it was my boss; one Lieutenant Commander Brooks." They both smiled at the memory. "You had quite a scare today too; didn't you?" she said.

His dark eyes clouded with pain and he turned away from her. "There's no hiding from your sharp green eyes, is there?" sighing resigned. They were sitting close together, his wheelchair tucked up against the open sided settee. Alyxx put a comforting arm over his broad shoulders feeling the soft tremors that shook his body.

"You shouldn't hide from what happened, Chakotay."

"I know, Alyxx. I'm just not ready for it."

"Let's get some dinner on the go," she encouraged, giving him a gentle hug. He smiled and followed her into the kitchen, where they prepared dinner for three, chattering away contentedly about all manner of things, but not what really troubled the human male.

Later that afternoon, she asked him about his journals, thus she collected them form the room he occupied and gave them to him.

"They'd got rather wet that day you arrived here, so I had to dry them out," she explained, revealing how she knew about them. "I didn't peak," her voice stern at his accusing expression.

"I didn't mean to imply...."

"I know you didn't," she said, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. "Why don't you start with the first one," she softly suggested. "This one I believe," picking out the dark reddish brown covered book. The binding's main structure was no bigger than a PADD, yet it was thicker along the spine of the book, revealing the well used and filled pages within. Chakotay opened it and read the hand written script inside, noting the date:

"Our first day in the Delta Quadrant aboard Voyager," he smiled at the memory. Alyxx settled on the floor at his feet as he read out loud about what he'd written that first day. "Repairs are going well; most of my crew are finding tasks to do to help Voyager back on her feet. Some resentment among both crews, but that is to be expected. I wonder what she'll do?" he stopped and looked at the page and the name he'd actually written – Captain Kathryn Janeway.

"So she didn't make you her First Officer straight away?"

"No; she didn't. She did take me on a tour of Voyager. It was the way she interacted with her crew that had me thinking of the possibility of serving under her command. Seriously thinking about it," he said remembering, dark eyes distant. Shaking away the memories, he continued to read; Alyxx Darkka politely listened, gaining some insight into her friend and what he'd gone through seven years ago. How he felt about the Maquis cause, Starfleet and putting on **that **uniform again, Tuvok's spying, Tom Paris, being stranded 70,000 light years from all they'd known and yet he was looking forward to the discoveries and challenges that lay ahead of them. The new people they would meet, planets and places to explore, new sights to see and witness.

"Sounds like quite an adventure you visualised for Voyager," she smiled.

"I suppose I did."

"Did you also see where you fitted into the picture on Voyager?" she asked gently. Instead of answering her, he gave her the journal open at the page headed – My Role!? She quietly read to herself what he'd written and was surprised by the revealing thoughts on the page before her.

When she'd finished she looked up at him and found him watching her face intently, his dark eyes bright with tears.

"What you've written here says you weren't sure of yourself in a Starfleet uniform. But I don't think it was the uniform that bothered you, it was whether you were betraying everything that the Maquis stood for, what you'd been fighting for," as she spoke silent tears slid down his cheeks.

"How you viewed the Treaty that created the DMZ that it was wrong for everyone, the Cardassians and how Starfleet had treated you for being a native of Dorvan V. Chakotay," she said taking both his hands into hers not quite knowing how to comfort him and all that he'd felt he'd lost at that time.

The raw emotions that crossed his face at her words, along with the tears still making silent tracks down his cheeks had Alyxx wondering if he would allow himself to heal and then he smiled at her gaining comfort from her presence and that she understood.

* * *

The next day he had a relapse and had to return to hospital more for general observation than anything seriously wrong with him. He knew his emotional well being was affecting his physical health, but the doctors at the main Trill hospital were concerned that something else was also impeding his healing process, just what that was they had yet to discover. Dr. Hoon was hoping that the EMH of Voyager might have a better insight as he knew the Human male known as Chakotay well. Although Hoon was impatient to hear from the Holographic medic he knew Chakotay had to want to contact his former crew mates of the Starship USS Voyager and Hoon wasn't about to push the man, just because he – Suaig wanted some answers. After a comfortable and trouble free night at the hospital, Hoon discharged his patient to return to his apartment.

* * *

Once again Chakotay sat in front of the com-unit waiting for the connection to be made. Alyxx in the interim had set up a pre-arranged prefix code, so that all he had to do was punch in the code and the computer did the rest. His eyes were closed when a female voice spoke his name softly.

"Nice to see you again," she said with a smile. "I'm at the home of the Paris'. I had to tell someone and Owen was the right choice. I hope you understand?"

"Yes, I understand," he faltered a moment. "Is Admiral Paris there?" he asked quietly.

"I'm here," responded a male voice, coming into view. "How are things with you?"

"Well enough. The doctors here have some problems discovering why I'm not healing properly."

"We may have an answer to that," Owen Paris said, valiantly hiding his shock at the male's less than healthy glow. Chakotay's dark skin was pale with deep shadows around his troubled eyes.

"Doctor Hoon will be pleased. He's my personal physician," he grinned. "Included with this connection is a code the Doctor can use to send any data files to." Both Gretchen and Owen could see that the male was doing his best to stay calm and converse politely with them, but his unease was all too plain and hurtful to see.

"I'm going to make a suggestion. Something we have both agreed upon," she said looking at the male beside her. "Why don't you correspond by electronic letter? That way you can take your time to think about what you want to say and it will be less time spent on an open channel. A channel that could eventually be traced," Gretchen said.

"Why?" he asked, although it was obvious that he liked the idea.

"We have reason to believe that what has been happening to you is due to the manipulation of events by Teero," said Owen Paris carefully. If they had thought Chakotay's face couldn't get any paler it just drained of all colour at the name of the Bajorian.

"I see," his voice trembling. "I'll contact you again, Admiral Paris," and with that he cut the connection. Gretchen and Owen looked at each other, sorrow in their eyes at the turn of events.

* * *

On Trill Chakotay stared at the screen and recalled what had happened on Voyager in the Delta Quadrant, when the Bajorian had used Tuvok to resurrect the Maquis rebellion and what he'd done to her.....suddenly he screamed and screamed. Darkka and Hoon came running, yet he continued to scream, until Alyxx threw some very cold water into his face. He hiccupped and looked at the Gorn and Trill, his body shaking, trying to find his voice.

"Teero," he whispered, hugging himself. "Teero," he said the name with such venom that Alyxx thought he would start screaming again.

"Don't Chakotay," she told him, putting her arms around him. "He's not worth it. And you'll only be allowing him to win," holding his shaking body close to hers.

"I'd like to do this person an injury," hissed Suaig Hoon, his facet eyes a deep pink-red hue. "I may be a doctor and would do no harm, but....." he left the thought unfinished, his hands clenched into tight fists, eyes really red.

Chakotay took comfort from both the Trill female who gently rocked him and the big green Gorn's anger. It also helped him regain control of his own anger and hurt at having been used against his will, yet again.

He slept for most of the rest of that day, out in the warm sunshine on a lounger in the small garden area of the apartment. Fortunately his sleep proved to be dreamless, aiding his bodies need to rest and heal.

* * *

Chakotay punched in the new code to connect him with the Paris household, as he waited he wondered if he could talk to Tom or if it would be the Admiral he'd relay messages through.

"Poocuh!" said a voice he knew well.

"Hello, Tom," he responded shyly.

"B'Elanna isn't here. But somehow from what Dad told me the last time you spoke to him and Gretchen, you'll be pleased at that," the younger man grinned. Suddenly his expression changed from jovial to sad and angry.

"Tom, please don't. I'm not ready to face that just yet. I've been reminded that I may never really get over it," he said, rushing to get his words out; it was the longest sentence he'd said of his own accord for sometime and he looked surprised. Tom's blue eyes twinkled mischievously.

"So when do we get our first correspondence then?" he asked cheekily.

"Now," sending the letter he'd carefully written.

"Thanks. Oh yes, the Doctor has sent a reply to your Dr. Hoon?" puzzled by the name.

"In answer to your question, Tom it's in my 'correspondence'," he grinned. "It's good to see you. Better go, write soon," he encouraged and shutdown the connection.

* * *

Tom Paris wasn't surprised, just a little disappointed, hearing his wife and mother coming into the house. He closed the com-unit having saved the letter from Chakotay.

"How are my favourite girls then?" he asked brightly, turning to face his wife.

"**He** called, didn't he?" her tone accusing. Paris didn't know quite how to handle this very angry woman. It was his mother who came to his rescue.

"B'Elanna, you heard what the Doctor said, when you grilled that poor man," her tone light, yet her expression showed her disapproval. "Chakotay needs time to recover in both body **and** mind. He won't do that if you start throwing cruel words at him. And don't tell **me **you won't because I've heard nothing else about what** you'd** say to Chakotay if you'd had the chance, all week. Now enough," she admonished commandingly. By this time her son was grinning at her, whilst B'Elanna looked totally startled and bemused, her daughter nestled in her arms.

"I'd forgotten how forceful you can be, Mother," he smiled. "It's good to be home," giving his wife a gentle kiss on her cheek and then took his daughter into his arms; it was the relieving her of her burden that she spoke.

"I just want him to be here," she said lamely.

"We know, my Dear," Julia Paris said, moving toward her daughter-in-law. "We all do," taking both the younger woman's hands into her own, her grey eyes conveying her concern and understanding. B'Elanna Torres, stepped into the older woman's personal space and was enveloped by her embrace which she returned.

"Let's get some lunch and then the pair of you can take some quiet time to read his letter. Any special lunch requests?" directing her question to her son, her arms still holding the younger woman.

"Pizza?" he replied hopefully. Julia laughed, shaking her head; she gently took B'Elanna to the kitchen. Bemused the half Klingon woman let herself be led. Tom Paris watched them go holding his young daughter who was smiling at him.

"You don't know what you're missing, Little one," he said softly. The girl-child gurgled at him.


	3. Chapter 3

**See Chapter one for Disclaimers:**

**Chapter 3**

Dr. Hoon read the Doctor's Report, his facet eyes turning a deep crimson colour, so much so that his fellow medics became quite concerned, but only Armel dared to approach the Gorn to enquire what was wrong.

"Oh, Armel," he hissed doing his best to control his anger. "You'd better read this for yourself. I suggest you sit down; it's not pleasant reading." The Trill medical technician took the Gorn's advice and was glad he did so, for Hoon had not been exaggerating.

"Why? That is what I can't understand," Armel said, having read the report, his skin paler than normal making his brown spots stand out, even more.

"I wish I knew. No doubt he had his reasons," he hissed. Armel had noticed that when Hoon was agitated or anxious his es's became longer and came out more like a hiss of a snake, it could be quite comical if it weren't for the fact that the green lizard's facet eyes were red.

"Do you want to tell....."

"NO! No, Armel," he said amending his tone. "At least we now know what we need to look for," he sighed. "Is that Human doctor still here?"

"If you mean Dr. Julian Bashir; yes he is," answering his own question. "Do want to arrange a meeting with him?"

"Please, Armel. Give him that," pointing to the data PADD. Armel nodded quietly and left the big Gorn to his troubled thoughts.

* * *

The lack of healing in Chakotay's bone structure was giving the medics treating him grave cause for concern, so when he was visited at home by the Starfleet Doctor Bashir, he was surprised.

"I wasn't aware you were here," he said warily, having greeted not only the doctor but the Trill Ezri Dax, who'd accompanied him and Hoon.

"Julian is still helping the symbionts to recover from the unrest and revolt, which took place not long after Voyager's return," Ezri informed him, standing next to her fellow Trill Alyxx. The two could not have been more different, Ezri young and dark with the usual Trill spots, and Alyxx older with longer hair and the soft forehead ridges to go with her lighter brown spots. Yet one could tell who carried the older symbiont. Knowing this newcomer was a trained councillor unsettled him.

"I think it's possible that you could help the symbionts and they you," Julian said carefully.

"How?" he asked frowning.

"Julian, be careful," Ezri advised, realising he knew, he'd not been told everything.

"Why should he do that? Don't I have a right....."

"Yes, Chakotay you do," Alyxx said quietly, moving to kneel beside him. "But in this case, we need to take extra care because of....."

"Teero!" he spat the name out, like a foul taste. "What has he done to me?" the venom still in his voice, his hands clenched into fighting fists.

"You not want to know," Hoon said sadly, his facet eyes reflecting his feelings on the matter. Chakotay didn't push it, reaching out to Alyxx who took his hands in hers.

"What, what do you need me to do?" he asked softly.

"Nothing for the moment, I'm afraid. We're still hoping to get the Symbiosis Commission to allow you free access to the pools."

"Julian, they are not going to allow that. We've been trying for weeks now, just to get them to agree to **you** going to the pools," Ezri snapped at him, her tone and body language spoke volumes as to her frustration with the Commission. They were all silent, thinking about the chain of events that had lead them here; and Bashir felt he had the answer to the symbionts problems and yet!

"The Tourist still has limited access, do they not?" he queried thoughtfully.

"What are you getting at, Chakotay?"

"Both Julian and I are off-worlder's, tourists if you like," he said, a grin forming on his face.

"It just might work. I'll have to find some civilian clothing," Julian Bashir grinned. "This will be fun!" his face lighting up.

"Hold your horses, both of you; Julian you are too well known to get passed the security guards at the entrance. That goes for you too, Chakotay!" Ezri admonished them both, yet their expressions didn't alter.

"I think that's where we come in, Ezri **Dax**!" the emphasis on her symbionts name wasn't lost on the younger woman. "Where's your sense of fun, Dax?" Alyxx Darkka enquired impishly.

"Lost along with my youth," she replied, but her mouth quirked suddenly into a beaming smile, seeing the irony of her statement.

For although Dax was in its ninth lifetime Ezri had only just started hers. "Perhaps we could make it a 'family' outing. Do you think your father will come?" she asked Darkka. The older woman smiled and said she'd ask, making for the com-unit.

* * *

The symbiont pools at the Caves of Mak'ala were somewhere Chakotay had wanted to go since arriving on Trillus Prime, but the usage of his wheelchair due to the nature of the damage to his pelvic bone, had made the idea of a visit to the pools a distant dream. Now here he was outside with four joined Trills and a young pioneering human doctor.

"Julian, why do you think I'll be able to help?" he asked softly, sitting in his chair enjoying the sunshine with Alyxx's father Azar Rohin and his new wife Sofian Ven; whilst Ezri and Alyxx went to speak to the Guardians.

"The drug currently in your system has the same chemical properties that the symbionts secrete when they mate. They don't produce this chemical; they just react to it and only for as long as they need to spawn. But lately the symbionts have been so badly traumatised by events of the last few months, that they're not responding, to the chemical changes in the pool waters the Guardians introduce," he explained sadly.

"That is to be expected, Julian," noted Azar. "Even now people are still unsettled and keep trying to hurt the symbionts."

"You hope that my presence will trigger a reaction?"

"It is possible," he said looking at the main entrance to the caverns.

"You don't sound hopeful, Dr. Bashir," commented Sofian Ven.

"I'm not. I'm not sure of anything, Dr. Ven. Without access to the pools I have no way of testing or evaluating any possible scenarios. It's so frustrating."

"I do know how you feel," she said putting a comforting hand on his arm. "My joining, however it happened has put me out of favour with the Commission Board."

"How did that happen?" Chakotay asked, trying to take his mind off what might happen in the pools. Sofian smiled at him. "Because I seem to remember you were somewhat of a sour bitch, if you'll pardon the pun." The woman laughed and then grinned.

"I was wasn't I?" she acknowledged. "I'd been asked by the Commission to assess the damage at the pools done by the rebels. They had not left the area and used my appearance to gain themselves entry. I ended up in the water and I couldn't swim. Out of reach of the Guardians who noticed my plight belatedly and just when I thought I'd taken my last breath, Ven came to my rescue," she paused putting her hand on her pouch where Ven resided, a gentle expression on her face. "Ven wriggled into my pouch and helped me to the surface. The Guardians realised what had happened before I did. I'd completed my own Initiate training, years ago but was passed over for younger candidates. Ven was the symbionts best breeder and was always passed over for a joining to others."

"So you both got what you wanted by fulfilling a need," he observed quietly. "You believe that Julian is right, don't you?"

"Like Julian, Chakotay I can't say for sure. The possibility is there and I believe we should take it, especially if it helps you also."

"There's no guarantee is there?" Her silence gave him his answer. Ezri and Alyxx rejoined them, their faces giving nothing away as to how the meeting with the Guardians had gone.

"Well don't keep us in suspense," said Bashir a tad irritated.

"The Guardians welcomed the idea, Julian."

"I got the feeling, Ezri if it weren't for the Symbiosis Commissions objections to **any** human just entering the caverns, let alone the waters of the pool; you could do your tests etc, with their full blessing and co-operation."

"But the Commission won't give their consent," noted Azar sadly.

"Has anyone asked the symbionts?" The others looked at him askance. "Just a thought, it is their future too," he added feeling he'd trodden on someone's toes. "Well isn't it?" anxious now.

"Of course it is, Chakotay," Sofian assured him. They continued to talk among themselves, yet Chakotay only half listened, so he was startled when his name was called.

"Sorry, I was miles away," he admitted.

"You were more than that!" Azar said, good-naturedly.

"Chakotay everything alright?" Alyxx asked him concerned. He didn't answer her as one of the Guardians approached and invited the group into the caverns.

"You'll need to change into the required garments," the Guardian said, leading them through the tunnels to the side rooms where they could change. Chakotay was helped by a Guardian to strip and put on the long white robe. It had to sit over his left shoulder as it was strapped to his side, to prevent any more damage to the broken bone. Chakotay listened as he was resettled into his chair, a soft 'hum' coursed through the air, but he wondered if anyone else heard as he appeared to be the only one who react to its presence. As they approached the pools he felt the hum increase in volume and he noticed the water was a light pulsing blue.

"Looks like they're communicating," said Sofian. For Chakotay her words were practically drowned out by the singing he could hear.

"Do you hear it?" he asked, feeling it thrum through his body as well as his mind.

"Hear what?" Julian asked, hearing only the silence of the area.

"A hum!" he replied, trying to shut it out, as it hurt his ears. It was Ven who realised what was happening and told Julian Bashir to do nothing, except monitor the situation. One of the Guardians gave the Doctor a Starfleet issue Medical tricorder and went to join his fellows who stood in a line together blocking anyone's access to the group and the pool. They too began to hum at the same frequency that only Chakotay could hear.

"This must cease!" shouted a new voice; one that Sofian recognised. She was about to go and deal with the newcomer – a member of the Symbiosis Commission Board and the most vocal opponent of any involvement by Starfleet; but the security guards under the direction of the Guardians held this person back very forcefully.

"We can not allow this violation...."

"Hush!" commanded one of the Guardians. "The symbionts are speaking," he said and then reclosed his eyes and continued humming along with his fellows. At the pool edge Chakotay sat feeling the hum vibrating through his body, he was at a lost as to what to do and then he heard a voice:

"You need to get into the water and trust us," the voice was Sofian or at least he thought it was.

Gentle hands helped him out of the chair and into the water; he felt the symbionts around him, touching him skin to skin - the robe no longer covering him - their song eager and encouraging at the same time. He could even pick out the odd individual but on the whole they were one massive choral choir. Chakotay felt as if he was drowning in that sound when a beacon of light amidst the noise shone out to reach him, the four voices of Ven, Rohin, Dax and Darkka.

//There's nothing to fear, Chakotay. Trust us we will not hurt you// they gently told him, even the chorus around him echoed that thought. Beneath him from the depths of Trill he heard a deeper hum reach out to him and enter his mind. He tried to fight this intrusion, this violation of him.

//Open your thoughts, do not resist, Chakotay Son of Kolopak// the new voice said in a tone that his spirit guide would use. //We mean you no harm, Shikasha// It was the use of the ancient name for 'brother' that Chakotay felt his resistant finally melt away; he took a deep breath and allowed himself to be pulled under the water, where the symbionts simulated him to sow his seed into the spawn around him.

* * *

Back on the shore within the cavern Julian sat at the pool edge monitoring the situation, his medical tricorder taking in all the data, his troubled eyes kept looking up at the four joined Trills, who also sat at the pools edge, linked together to each other and the symbionts in the pool, as the electrical blue flashes were continually going from the four to the water and back again. For a second time he saw Chakotay disappear beneath the surface of the water and a cloud of sperm spill into and around the symbiont spawn. The tricorder bleeped as the male again broke the surface of the blue broiling waters. Julian Bashir noted the electrical activity in the man's brain which told him something that shouldn't be happening.

"This must stop!" said the Commission's Official. It was more of a plea, rather than a command.

"That could prove somewhat difficult," he responded, still reading his tricorder.

"That man's **Human**!" the woman spat.

"True, he is," he said getting to his feet to confront the woman. "I don't understand it any more than you do," Bashir commented without emotion. "But it **is** happening and before our eyes."

They could see Chakotay's naked body just beneath the surface of the water, which had not stopped flashing blue since before the male entered the pool and continued to do so. As they watched the symbionts acting like spawning fish, flicked and swam over and around the male's body, paying particular attention to his pelvic region. Once more he took a deep breath and held it as the symbionts pulled him into their realm and his seed gushed out of him. When he broke the surface this time it was clear to see that he was exhausted, his breathing quick and shallow. He was gently nudged towards the four joined Trill who helped him out of the water, which was now calm and filled with warm fertile spawn.

A Guardian wrapped a heavy thick gown around the male's naked body.

"We have a sleep chamber prepared for him," he said and was about to lead the way, but the Symbiosis Commission's Official stepped in their way.

"He is to leave here now!" she ordered angrily. Bashir grabbed her arm and pulled her aside, allowing the group to proceed. "I should have you arrested," glaring at him.

"Maybe you should," he sighed. "But you should know this; Chakotay is currently linked to **every **symbiont within a these caverns. To break that link would be damaging not only to him, but the symbionts as well, including those who are joined," he said forcefully. He let the thought of recent events hang between them and then he joined the Guardian who had escorted his friends from the area. The female Trill stood there feeling abandoned recalling the painful events of the last few months, realising what the Starfleet doctor meant. Suddenly the waters in the pool became disturbed and a large wave left the surface and dowsed the Commission's Official, drenching her from head to foot in cold, very cold water.

"I think you had better leave, Ma'am," said a Guardian trying to hide his smile. With as much dignity as she could muster she stormed out of the area.

* * *

He stirred in the warm comfortable bed, the chorus in his mind a gentle hum. He could still pick out the odd individual but it was Ven, Rohin, Dax and Darkka who stood out to him. It was also comforting to know that they were close. Chakotay knew it was Darkka who sat next to his bed and that she hadn't left his side at all.

"You should get some sleep too," he said drowsily, opening an eye to look at her.

"I will," she assured him. "How do you feel?"

"As though I've slept for a week," stretching his body under the thick covers. "I seem to have done nothing else but sleep," he grinned.

"Sleep is good medicine, as any doctor will tell you," noted a new voice.

"Hello, Julian," he said grinning at the man, who ran his medical scanner over him. "How am I shaping up?" he asked, cheekily. Alyxx smiled, happy to hear him playfully tease the doctor.

"If your sense of humour is anything to go by, I'd say reasonable!" he said his face deadpan.

"Hmm, that bad?" Chakotay questioned. Alyxx Darkka laughed, until she was crying tears of joy.

"Now look what you've done," Julian accused, shaking his head sorrowfully.

"What is going on?" asked Sofian concerned, entering the chamber, Ezri on her heels. One look at the two male's deadpan faces and twinkling eyes and she knew they were exercising their human sense of humour. She stood closed fists on her hips, expression stern.

"You two look like a couple of mischievous school boys. Now behave the pair of you or you'll be put on report," she said, yet her own eyes were telling. Darkka by this time had got her mirth under some semblance of control, but she wasn't sure how long that would hold.

"Ah! Miss," sulked Julian Bashir dramatically, "It is the holidays; surely we can have some fun!" he pouted. Sofian looked from one to the other totally mystified by what the two males were playing at, especially as Alyxx burst out laughing again. Peeping out from under the covers, Chakotay grinned cheekily, whilst Bashir tried his best to keep a straight face and failed miserably.

"Sounds like a rumpus is going on in here," said Azar, watching his daughter holding her sides, her face happy.

"More like a rebellion," said Sofian Ven.

"Ah! You've yet to understand the human concept called humour," he said, looking round at the Starfleet personnel. "I think we should leave them to it," he said leaning toward her ear and gently steered his wife out of the chamber.

"Don't. Not another word out of either of you," Alyxx admonished the two males, rubbing her aching sides. "I think I'll get some fresh air," quietly getting to her feet and ignoring them both. Ezri watched her go and yet kept a stern eye on the two males; she shook her head at them and left herself.

For a moment Doctor and patient quietly contemplated each other and then Bashir took the seat Alyxx had vacated, beside the bed.

"We did over do it!"

"True, but it felt good," he said and sighed. "What news do you have for me, Doctor Bashir?"

The younger man sat quietly and looked seriously at his patient, knowing that he had a right to hear all the facts about his case. Julian took a deep breath and started to give Chakotay the details of his recent medical history.

* * *

What the Doctor had told him hadn't been pleasant to hear and he knew that he still had to under go some more tests to ascertain whether he was free of the drug and all that went with its use and the healing of his bone structure. He certainly wasn't looking forward to his shoulder being reset, but at least his pelvis shouldn't cause too many problems and he'd be able to leave the wheelchair behind.

Chakotay was still at the symbiont pools being cared for by the Guardians. He was grateful for the peace and a chance to think. Today he sat at the pool edge, watching the water and listening to the gentle singing of the symbionts; His link to them all but a distant memory. He'd been a little disappointed to learn that his DNA would be overruled by the symbionts.

"Were you hoping for some little Chakotay's?" teased a voice he knew well, as she sat down beside him. He smiled softly.

"I don't know what I was expecting, Alyxx," he replied honestly, still looking at the water. "I feel so...used," he admitted, after a moment's silence.

"Not used, My Friend; abused, would be a better description. Including what happened on Voyager," she told him. She sat close to him without touching him physically, for he was wary of being hurt. "You've endured, physical, mental, sexual and psychological abuse, that's going to take sometime to come to terms with."

"Are you assigned as my counsellor?" he asked with a smile.

"I wish I was, Chakotay," her tone caused him to look at her. "I've received my recall to return to active duty," she said sadly. "I leave day after tomorrow," answering his unspoken question.

"I shall miss you," his dark eyes revealing more than his words.

"And I you," gently placing her hand on his arm. "Time heals all wounds, or so they say. You need time to find yourself, who you are, what you want from life."

"And you think I won't find that with you around," he teased, trying to smile whilst feeling very sad and unhappy that she was leaving Trill and him.

"I don't know, Chakotay," she responded truthfully, her green eyes sad also. "Do you remember Professor Fen?" she asked lightly, changing the subject.

"I can recall a Professor Fenayard. Why?" puzzled by her growing grin.

"Wait and see," she said mysteriously, getting to her feet and holding out her hand to him, to help him up back into the wheelchair. He took the offer and returned, not to the sleep chamber but to the main city – Mak'ala with her and Hoon's apartment. That night they shared a meal together swapping stories of different events in their lives as Starfleet officers and the various Commanding officers they'd served under. Hoon told them something of his life on Gornia and Cestas III, especially his childhood as a youngling.

Chakotay spent a peaceful night feeling warm and content, although he knew in the morning by the time he awoke Alyxx Darkka would have gone, to rejoin her ship as head of the science department, he was pleased he'd come to her home planet – Trillus Prime and spent the time getting to know her again, rather than going to Dorvan V or his sister's residence. Now all he had to do was to get well so he could find himself, he owned her, himself and his friends on Voyager that much. The morning would be a new day and for once he was looking forward to its arrival.


End file.
